FEMA Planning Zombie UFO Crash Site Drills?
Posted: May 1, 2013 Filed under: Nerd HQ | Tags: FEMA, Roswell, UFO, Zombies 2 CommentsNow I love zombies as much as the next person, but this is a little creepy. A gentleman named David VanDerBeek is running for Governor of Nevada in 2014. On his website, VanDerBeek claims that he found a page on FEMA’s site that listed plans for a disaster drill called — and I quote — ZOMBIE UFO CRASH DISASTER FULL-SCALE EXERCISE. (See screenshot below.) He says that when he contacted FEMA for more information, they took the page down.
So either this guy’s a gubernatorial conspiracy nut with mad Photoshop skillz, or FEMA has a better sense of humor than we’ve been led to believe. This makes no sense. A zombie disaster drill? Sure. A UFO crash response exercise? Duh. (I’ve been to Roswell. I didn’t just fall off the alien turnip truck.)
But a Zombie UFO Crash drill? That’s just ridiculous. Zombies don’t have the motor skills required to fly a UFO. Everyone knows that.
This had better be fake. I have no idea how to fight off intergalactic zombies.
No Faint Hearts in Fort Worth... 
This means that corn and grains are not part of this plan.
This happened because of our turtle-like evolution as well as
the world’s modernization. Experiencing easy weight loss and improved health on a diet
emphasizing vegetables and whole foods isn’t surprising to obesity experts like Dr.
So you’re saying that the zombies – being on a protein-based diet plan – will easily be able to take down the average overweight, Cheeto-obsessed American? Those fiendish bastards!