Who ya gonna call? Ghostbusters! (Also, me.)
Posted: September 14, 2013 Filed under: Ghosts 6 CommentsVery excited to be taking my first paranormal investigation class today! Taught by the owner of Fort Worth Ghost Tours, the workshop will discuss the basics of ghost-hunting and feature demonstrations on how to use the basic tools of the trade (K-2 meters, EVP recorders, etc.)
So, if you want to know if your house is haunted, call me. I will put my crack paranormal investigative skills to work. If you’ve got ghosts, it will be confirmed by me running away screaming in a very professional manner.
Bravery: It’s overrated.
Spooky Jewel-Encrusted Saint Skeletons Found In Catacombs
Posted: September 11, 2013 Filed under: Bizarre, Miscellaneous | Tags: Bejeweled skeletons, Catacombs of Rome, Catholic, Christian martyrs, Heavenly Bodies: Cult Treasures and Spectacular Saints from the Catacombs, Skeleton 5 CommentsIn a particularly morbid find, a 400-year-old collection of heavily jeweled skeletons has been discovered in Europe. The bodies of Catholic martyrs and saints were meticulously decorated with precious jewels, pearls and crowns centuries ago and displayed for the poor to worship. Which in no way is a dick move by the Church at all.
Are we sure this isn’t what’s left of Liberace?
Some of them were displayed in rather flamboyant costumes.
Breast plate? Check. Hoop skirt? Check. Pimp cup. Check. Now, who’s ready to get saintly all up in here?
And some were arranged in inexplicably hilarious, come-hither poses.
“How YOU doin’?”
Cryptid Corner: Walking Shark Discovered in Indonesia
Posted: September 7, 2013 Filed under: Cryptozoology, Nerd HQ, Writing | Tags: Halmahera, Indonesia, Shark, walking shark 3 CommentsA new species of shark that can actually WALK has been discovered in Indonesia. This new species uses four sturdy fins like feet to waddle along the ocean floor looking for small prey.
It’s like watching the world’s ugliest underwater puppy.
This new species is small and harmless to humans. SO FAR.
How long before it learns to walk on land? How long before it gets bigger and develops a taste for blood? How long before SyFy Channel execs have it starring in “Land Shark: Tooth or Consequences”?
I want to give you a big hug. With my teeth.
Dear Japan: I Love You
Posted: September 5, 2013 Filed under: Nerd HQ | Tags: Cucumber Pepsi, disgusting Doritos, Japanese snack food, octopus ice cream, pranks 6 CommentsDear Japan:
Damn you, you sexy bitch. You gross us all out by producing some of the most terrifying snack food on the planet.
Cumber Pepsi: Add a twist of radish to complete a hat-trick of horrible.
Crispy Salmon Doritos: Leave these out for Santa and see what happens.
Octopus-flavored ice cream – Now with extra tentacle! (You knew there would be a tentacle joke in here somewhere.)
But then you lure me back with this hilarious video.
I wish I knew how to quit you.
Sad Roswell UFO News
Posted: August 31, 2013 Filed under: Nerd HQ 4 CommentsLeading Roswell witness Dr. Jesse Marcel, Jr. — a retired Navy physician who went back to active duty to serve as a flight surgeon during the Iraq war IN HIS 60’s, earning the rank of colonel — recently passed away at his home in Montana.
Dr. Marcel, seen here casually being a bad-ass motherfucker.
Dr. Marcel’s dad, Major Jesse Marcel was the first military officer to arrive on the scene of the infamous Roswell UFO crash of 1947. Major Marcel brought home some of the debris to show his son and wife before it was confiscated by the Air Force. Jesse Jr. later wrote a fascinating book on the subject: “The Roswell Legacy.”
I got to meet Dr. Marcel at a press conference several years ago when I was a newspaper writer. He was gracious enough to autograph a Roswell book for me at that time.
The rumors that I geeked out like a UFO fangirl during this encounter have been greatly exaggerated.
Despite being a respected physician and Iraq war veteran, Dr. Marcel defied convention to insist that the Roswell crash did happen and that his father had been strong-armed into helping with the cover-up – a story I touched on in a previous post. He had the courage to stand by his convictions and will always be a hero of mine.
Rest in Peace, Colonel Marcel. You sleep among the stars now.
Meanwhile, back at the Schicklgruber’s house in 1901 Austria…
Posted: August 29, 2013 Filed under: Writing | Tags: Hitler, Mercedes Benz commercial, Schicklgruber 2 CommentsBest Mercedes commercial EVER.
This Week in Loch Ness Monster News….
Posted: August 28, 2013 Filed under: Cryptozoology, Nerd HQ | Tags: Fort Augustus, Loch, Loch Ness, Loch Ness Monster, Nessie Leave a commentA Scottish photographer recently captured photos and a video of what he believes could be the elusive Nessie taking a swim through the Loch. It’s either the Monster or one GINORMOUS eel.
It’s huge, black and phallic. Call the Kardashian sisters.
Of course, some people love Nessie, and some people love Nessie.
Monster fetishes: More common than you think.
Also, for the record — do not Google “sexy lake monster” even to find funny photos for your blog. Bad things happen, people. Very bad things.
I think they mean “Lady of the Land of Lakes” Butter Fan Club.
Nerd HQ: The Most Romantic Thing I Have Ever Seen
Posted: August 26, 2013 Filed under: Nerd HQ Leave a comment
Why, yes… I do own Wookiee-print pajamas. Why do you ask?
Sometimes You Just Need to Pack Up Your Dinosaurs and Leave the Room
Posted: August 22, 2013 Filed under: Miscellaneous, Nerd HQ 2 CommentsCheck out this brilliant post about Ray Bradbury on my friend Anita’s wonderful blog “Anita’s Notebook”:
Packing up your dinosaurs… easier said than done.
Get Ready for Ghost Shark!
Posted: August 21, 2013 Filed under: Cryptozoology, Ghosts, Nerd HQ | Tags: Ghost, Ghost Shark, Sharknado, Slip N Slide, Syfy, Tim Taylor 2 CommentsEveryone set their DVRs for the world premiere of Ghost Shark at 8 p.m. CST Thursday on the SyFy Channel. In a move that promised to make Sharknado look like a guppy caught in a wind tunnel, Ghost Shark features the undeniable genius of people being haunted/eaten by a ghostly Great White. I am also thrilled to announce that Friend of the Blog and actor extraordinaire Tim Taylor stars in Ghost Shark as Deputy Hendricks. (It also features the guy who played Bull on Night Court.) But mainly Tim, who you may also know from an obscure little indie film called The Hunger Games. Will Tim get eaten by the Ghost Shark? Will he return for the sequel, presumably titled Return of Ghost Shark: Back for the Halibut? You’ll have to tune in to find out. For info on Tim, check out his website here.
A fat kid rides a Slip N Slide straight into the jaws of Ghost Shark. Because awesome.
To my knowledge, this is not a scene from Ghost Shark, but a photo that I found when I googled “Ghost” and “Shark.” Perhaps it’s a still from SyFy’s upcoming film SuicidalSharkMan: Nobody’s Chum.
(Seriously, though… what the HELL?)
No Faint Hearts in Fort Worth... 
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